First Thoughts

… we are installed in the cottage… slightly frustrating day doing so… cleaning lady late, dogs pooping and peeing in the cottage… no desire to cook, only the news available… H able to pursue their news addiction, sound pollution for me…

… HCR meter all about how it is increasingly evident that there was a full blown coup attempt… that it only barely failed… that the attempt is not over… the white patriarchy is desperate… democracy hangs in the balance… is the clock running out for dems to do something about it?…

… the internet is so pathetic at the cottage, which has wifi, or supposedly has wifi, but it is utterly useless… even in the wee hours of the morning when nobody else would be using it there is no bandwidth… there might as well not be any wifi at all…

… thinking about Modern Nature… thinking about the promiscuity of cruising parks and hooking up… thinking about the anger towards heterosexuals who would think such behavior among themselves ill advised… sex was rarely just sex to me… i dated one girl at a time and that girl had a chance of becoming something more to me and i to her… there were a few one night stands that were not satisfying… the idea of cruising the park seems crazy to me… that was the gay culture that DJ participated in, embraced, even after being diagnosed with AIDS… he claimed that little penetrative sex was indulged in once the gay community understood how the disease was transmitted… just hand jobs… still, it all seems risky behavior… behavior that was only about sex, not love… i don’t insist on heterosexual love… i just prefer sex in the context of a loving relationship…

… insects chirping outside, grasshoppers?, katydids?, cicadas?, what do they have on the island?… i wonder whether the noises they make leads predators as well as lovers to them… if so, what a risk they take for love…